Saturday, July 24, 2010

What is said in the silence...

Beams bathe me in their orange fire
As we sit in silence
Your eyes draw mine to yours
Like moths to a flame

The words that bubble
In the warmth of my heart
Go unspoken
Fear rules me in this moment

Love is patient
But how long do I wait
Before silence overcomes
The chaos in my heart

Falling into your gaze
Whispering to the sun
Of the boiling overflow
Of a love forever pondered

and never spoken.


So I dream a lot. Like every night, I have a new adventure/comedy/horror to share with my friends the next morning after I wake up. And I occasionally wonder why I have these dreams, or dream about the specific things I do. Sometimes, I think it's the little combinations of thoughts from the previous day, all culminating into one chaotic and non-nonsensical fairytale. Other times, it might represent my desires, my fears, or my ambitions. And other times, I think it's very spiritual, and sometimes, very scary.

Example 1: I dream myself into the role of Ishmael in Moby Dick. As captain Ahab and I sail along the ocean in search of Moby Dick, the whale emerges from the water and is about to eat the ship when I hold up my hands and shout for everyone to stop and make peace. Apologies all around (including the whale, with his deep whaley voice). Dream then follows the whale back down to the ocean floor, which goes suddenly into cartoon, with underwater phone booths, and party hats celebrating the end of fear for the whale.

Example 2: I dream that I have been kidnapped and trapped in a room, that i can't escape from. All tunnels leading away from it lead back into it. I am trapped in a cage. Being caged is my biggest fear.

Example 3: I dream that I am at my cousins' and it is being invaded by demons who are ready to possess us. I run and find a small row boat and begin paddling. They find some massive slave trading ship, and follow behind me. I have some strange ability to paddle very quickly, and keep ahead of them. I see an island with a large cross, make shore and run up to it and hug it close. The demons land, and all the people who they have possessed fall on the ground at the sight of the cross and begin weeping. They are free, and I am safe.
Not all my spiritual dreams end so nicely though. Many are dark, and many are so creepy and frightening that I end up unable to go back to sleep for hours. And yet, I realized last night, after waking out of a horrible nightmare, that it is so ridiculous for me to be afraid of these demons that haunt those dreams. God is the only one I should fear, and he has complete and total control over me. I have already surrendered myself to him, and 'He that is in me is greater than he that is in the world.' So I realized that God loves me, and his angels are encamped around me if I recognize that I should fear God and God alone. For he is my Father, my ever present friend and lover, and I should never be afraid. Even of cages. uggggh.
Read Psalm 34 for more insight ;)

Peace, love, and happiness mes amis!

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Funny One...

So today I experienced a very blonde moment, and thought you might enjoy a laugh. When asked whether the store I am working at is open 7 days a week, I responded, "Nope. It is open 8."


Thursday, July 1, 2010

I Will Stand and Love

"Therefore put on the full armour of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand." - Ephesians 6:13

"Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you." - Matthew 5:44

"Then I heard another voice from heaven say: "Come out of her, my people, so that you will not share in her sins, so that you will not receive any of her plagues." - Revelation 18:4

I recently found myself in a discussion on obedience to governing authorities. The man to which I was addressing myself claimed that we have only have freedom under the law, for it is only under law that we have the methods to secure a safe and secure environment to live within. Although we are two different people, and perhaps I did not understand where his starting point was in the discussion, I have to say that yes. In the world, we are subject to law. But more importantly, as a Christian, I am subject to a much higher authority than law. I am subject to a moral call to love the Lord my God with all my heart, soul, and mind, and to love my neighbour as myself. Upon this commandment, all the law hangs. So what is the law to me?

Human law is, in many ways, dead. It is something to which I submit myself to show love to those in authority, and the majority of the time, I will not go out of my way to disobey the laws in my country so long as they comply with the standards of other-centered love and morality that I know God desires. Once these two clash, I no longer follow man, but God, who guides my conscious and my heart.

At the point at which the law goes against the heart of Jesus, I will refuse to follow the laws and the declarations of man, and work for love, justice, and mercy for those being oppressed. Screw freedom. I want something better - I want Christ's kingdom on Earth. I'm not waiting for death to see heaven, I want to live it now. So tease me, curse me, beat me, kill me, do whatever you like if you think my chosen disobedience to the oppressive economies and laws of this world are strange. I'll take it. And love you in return.